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<\/strong><\/span>As a well established kathak dancer, what is it like to look back on your very first experience of kathak dance? What encouraged you to take your first kathak class, and what was your very first class with Guruji like?<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\nWell to be honest, I never had an inclination or desire to study kathak dance. As a child I had studied Bharatanatyam and when I arrived at UC Berkeley as a young college student, I was looking for a Bharatanatyam teacher to continue my studies. My impression of kathak dance was informed by what I had seen in Bollywood movies – and it looked to me like kathak was about looking pretty and flirting. Bharatanatyam on the other hand seemed to have the rigor and gravitas that I was looking for. I was unable to find a Bharatanatyam teacher and eventually, a friend of a friend invited me to come try a kathak class on Telegraph Avenue. I told her that I wasn\u2019t really interested in kathak and she insisted that I at least come and watch a class.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n I remember that first visit to Guruji\u2019s class like it was yesterday. Guruji was sitting on the floor playing tabla and singing Holi Tarana. There were nine or ten dancers in the class, drenched in sweat and moving to the music he was creating. I remained mesmerized for the entirety of the class, losing track of time and any other reality aside from the energy of the class. At one point in time a group of Hare Krishnas passed by the front door of the studio. As the sounds of their music and chanting filtered in, Guruji made a pointed joke about how we were invoking the very Krishna that they were searching for. I don\u2019t remember much after that first class. But looking back now, I can see that some part of me made a decision that day to dive into Guruji\u2019s world.\u00a0<\/span> For me, it was Guruji\u2019s approach to the art, what he represented, what he believed that drew me to kathak. He taught me that our journey in life is ultimately spiritual. Whether we choose to be artists, parents, lovers, leaders, servants – it is all spiritual. The pursuit of the art for him was the pursuit of the divine. His willingness to walk his own journey with courage and grace was inspiring to watch. His generosity in guiding all of his students on their own journeys was unbounded. <\/span><\/p>\n Guruji taught me that as an artist you are in service to the art, the divine, your students and your audiences. He taught me to be ever humble and willing to take complete responsibility for not only myself but my peers, students, family, community and society. He taught me how to wrestle with and understand ego, open my heart again and again, and be always in service to something greater than myself. Being an artist is to be a spiritual warrior.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n And the path of an artist and spiritual warrior is an arduous one. At times it seems that all of it is challenging. Guruji\u2019s mantra was practice, practice, practice. Initially, I understood it to apply to the dance alone. But more and more, I understand that life must be approached like that – practice, practice, practice. Every day there are opportunities to be courageous and open-hearted, to live from a place of grace and love. Guruji\u2019s teachings apply on and off the dance floor and infuse all aspects of life.\u00a0<\/span> Training and performing with the company was an exacting experience. Guruji, of course, demanded excellence. It was an incredible journey. It is very hard to zoom out and reflect on it because it really was an immersive and all-consuming journey. I feel like once I said yes to being in the company, I was just guided by Guruji, and over the course of dancing and performing in the company, I learned, grew, stretched, and became a dancer. I think being in the company really affirmed for me what is possible in the art form as a company, as opposed to a soloist, what impact company works and productions can have, and how they bring out and communicate very different aspects of the dance which\u00a0 traditional solos do not. I also saw how important productions and choreographic works were to introducing new audiences to the artform and bringing more and more people into the world of kathak dance. Kathak can be inaccessible; it’s ancient, culturally specific, and there is a lot of nuance and sophistication. <\/span><\/p>\n For me, watching Guruji create production after production\u2013taking each from concept to music composition to choreograph to performance\u2013it was a great gift that I got to be a part of that process. I really learned what it is to be a choreographer in comparison to an artist. Costuming, lighting, sound, music, dance. All of that is a part of making a production great. I got to see how much Guruji tried to bridge the gap between the artform and the lay audience. Even as he was creating great works of art, ultimately, the intention behind these great works was about connecting to the audience. <\/span>Also, I think for me, one of the things I thought was fascinating was that Guruji\u2019s works were consistently about uplifting audiences. He wanted people to walk away feeling uplifted. From him I learned that, as an artist, when you are creating you constantly have to think about what it is you want the audience to experience, to have, how you want them to leave, and what you give to them. Watching him over and over give joy and uplift his audiences gave me a sense of his true purpose in the arts.<\/span><\/span><\/p>\n Lastly, while Guruji really instilled in us the value of the traditional kathak solo\u2013that we have to perform, preserve, and advance that tradition\u2013I feel that creating choreographic works and productions and establishing kathak on the western stage was a big part of his vision, and part of his vision that I always wanted to be a part of. He believed kathak belonged on the world stage side by side along with the best traditions of the world. He wanted to provide kathak dance an elevated place in society, and he believed kathak deserved it.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span> I was injured within six months of attending my first dance class. One day, quite suddenly, I began to experience intense pain in both of my knees. The pain was debilitating and I saw many doctors, each of whom gave me a different diagnosis. One sports medicine doctor told me that due to structural problems with the placement of my femur bones, I was never going to be able to pursue dance seriously. He prescribed me painkillers and saw me off. I was devastated. I continued to attend Guruji\u2019s class but would sit for the duration of the class\u2013reciting, singing, crying, and watching my peers advance. This went on for eight months as I saw acupuncturists, herbalists, and any kind of alternative health care practitioner I could find. I remember looking to God, trying to understand why I would find a teacher like Guruji and then be confronted with a debilitating injury. Eventually, I found my way to a Pilates instructor who looked at my hips and legs and said that the issue was a simple matter of imbalanced alignment. She viewed the injury as easily fixable and didn\u2019t see any reason why I couldn\u2019t dance. So I began the grueling work of retraining my body\u2019s foundational structural patterns. The process of recovery was bumpy. I would make progress, get excited, overextend myself on the dance floor and reinjure myself. Guruji allowed me to struggle with my body and soul in his class. He gave me modifications, helped me wrestle with my ego, and created an entire low-impact class for me. I was blindly stubborn in my desire to dance, and he was there to provide me with a safe and supportive container within which I could walk the journey I was supposed to. I had incredible support from my guru-sister Seibi Lee, who painstakingly spent hours inspecting my body\u2019s alignment, helping me adjust my technique to avoid injury, teaching me to recite and play manjira so I could stay engaged when I had to sit in class. My injuries were, in some ways, a rite of passage. They tested not only my desire to dance but also my intention. Even now, when faced with an injury, I see it as a sign that I have strayed from the right intention. An injury is a sign that my desire to dance is laced with ego. My injuries help guide me back to a deeper and truer desire to dance\u2013for freedom, joy, and connection.\u00a0\u00a0<\/span>\u00a0\u00a0<\/span> I had never intended to get involved in fundraising at Chhandam. I came to Guruji to dance. But one day, Guruji walked into class and expressed his intense frustration at the financial difficulties the organization was having as it prepared to present Masters in Performance<\/em>, a concert featuring Guruji with Pt. Swapan Chaudhuri, at the Cubberley Theater in Palo Alto, CA. My heart sank hearing him talk. I felt indignity and injustice on my Guruji\u2019s behalf. I couldn\u2019t fathom how it was that great artists, tradition – and – legacy bearers such as my Guruji had to struggle for the meager resources it took to organize a small concert. I was compelled to action and organized a campaign to gather ads from South Asian businesses in Berkeley and the South Bay. Together with my guru sisters, we raised $8,000 to help support that concert. Over the next decade and a half, I became increasingly involved in fundraising for the organization\u2019s work. I helped write grants and organized fundraising events. As I advanced in my studies under Guruji, taught at Chhandam, and performed with CDDC, I began to understand how crucial financial support was for the advancement of the art form. <\/span><\/p>\n
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What is it about the art and specifically Pandit Das\u2019s teachings of it that particularly inspired you? Are there any particular aspects that resonate with you the most?\u00a0 Which aspects are the most challenging?\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n
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You were a member of the Chitresh Das Dance Company from 2004-2015.\u00a0 Can you talk about your experience training and performing with the company, both in terms of your own trajectory in the dance and the trajectory of an Indian classical dance company performing on the western proscenium stage?<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n
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<\/span>You faced significant injuries and physical challenges throughout your training as a dancer. Most people would have given up if confronted with the seriousness of the issues you faced. Can you describe what those challenges were and how you overcome them and continue to today?\u00a0\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n
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One of your first roles at Chhandam was in fundraising\u2013one of the most difficult aspects of nonprofit work. Can you speak about how you became so fearless in this daunting work and the importance of fundraising for nonprofit arts organizations such as ours? How did that work lead to your vision to launch the Leela Endowment, which is unprecedented for Indian classical arts?<\/strong><\/span><\/h4>\n![\"\"](\"https:\/\/leela.dance\/devsite2\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/04\/b5tZ8-768x574-1.jpeg\")
I became increasingly impassioned about freeing artists from the grueling pressure of making ends meet so that they could carry the art form forward. In 2012, I began to talk with Guruji and the team at Chhandam about an endowment. While everyone could see the merit in establishing an endowment, it seemed like a fantasy. How could a small arts nonprofit raise millions of dollars? Three years later, the year of Guruji\u2019s passing, I decided that it was imperative to establish the endowment. Guruji\u2019s sudden passing forced me to face many realities. One of them was the harsh reality that time does not wait for anyone. I began to raise funds for the endowment in earnest. I am very grateful for those individuals who lent me their belief as I started work on the endowment\u2013my mom and my dear friend Trina Chaudhuri. I am grateful for my guru sisters Rachna Nivas and Seibi Lee, who lent the idea their enthusiasm and belief. I am grateful to Dr. Ushakant Thakkar, who was the endowment\u2019s first major donor. His support and encouragement propelled the work forward. I am grateful to the Leela Board of Directors as well as all of the community of donors that have come together to establish the first self-standing endowment for Indian classical dance and music.<\/span>\u00a0<\/span>
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